When you have kids, it’s all about the crazy gene

RobbieHuffakerThese days I often try to recall my childhood, attempting to pinpoint exactly where the traits my sons exhibit come from.

In particularly I search for the roots of the crazy gene.

Now, many of my peers may not have hit this point in their lives yet—meaning settled down with children—so maybe stick this article in your back pocket for the future. If nothing else you’ll be able to look back at it and say, “Yep, crazy gene.”

I am not sure why scientists have not picked up on the existence of the dreaded crazy gene in kids ages 1-10 (and counting), but I assure you it is a serious problem in this country. Take my oldest son for example.

One lazy Sunday years ago I had a couple friends over and we were watching football.  When the games had ended and my friends were getting ready to leave, we noticed that one of their pairs of sandals were missing.

After searching for about fifteen minutes with no luck, we gave up.

This was very strange, as my friend was fairly certain he had worn shoes to my house.

We asked my oldest son who shrugged us off and continued playing with his toys. My friend ended up leaving without shoes that day.

Fast-forward six weeks, I am looking through some boxes in my son’s closet and what do I find? Yep, a pair of men’s size ten sandals.  The reason for the shoe abduction is still unclear today.

Not convinced of the crazy gene yet? Ok, try this one out then.

When my youngest son—who is now five—was two, he loved this one small Tonka truck.

It was an older-style truck, made of metal and actually painted, though chipped after years of play.

Pretty sure both of his brothers had played with it in previous years, so we were used to it being around.

One day he is pushing it around the living room and one of his brothers does something to anger him (who knows what).

Now, at two years old you are not exactly over-flowing with self-control, which is also what I told myself as I watched that old chipped up Tonka truck flying—almost in slow motion—through the air, finally reaching its destination, the 46’ TV on the other side of the room.

Needless to say, crazy gene-2, TV-0.

I was upset with the loss of an expensive television, but amazed at the strength of my two year olds arm; those trucks are heavy.

So be prepared everyone, when and if you have kids, never assume anything is off-limits.

From cutting the charger cable to an iPad for no reason what-so-ever, to painting bright orange fingernail polish all over the couch, the crazy gene does not discriminate.

It’s pre-implanted into all kids and it will get you someday too. Be warned…..

That being said, the crazy gene is also what makes every day of parenthood special.

I may be balding before 40, sometimes feel like Homer from The Simpsons, and have to ask, “What were you thinking?” a million more times before they all move out and tackle college themselves; but I am thankful for every eye-rolling moment I get with them.

And you will be too, trust me.

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